Dominoes 105b: Awkward Couples

Well, did you two have a nice meal?” Robert asked, as he and Grace walked up to Caleb and Jenny, who were sitting at their table talking quietly. Jenny jumped, “Bobby! You scared me!”

“Sorry,” Robert said, laughing. “Are you ready to go?”

“Sure,” Caleb said, “I paid ages ago. I think the waitress was getting read to ask me if we were going to order dinner, too.”

We got to the car, and Grace, naturally, sat by Robert, while Jenny and Caleb awkwardly got in the back. “On to the mall,” Robert said. “Caleb, you are going to have to help Jenny shop for a few minutes, Grace and I have something we need to get.”

“Ok,” Caleb said, and the silence was palpable. Robert knew he should’ve told Grace what he was trying to do with Jenny and Caleb but, how could he? And after what had happened with Grace…

“And then I think I will let Grace help Jenny. I want to show Caleb something at the bookstore.”

Caleb brightened up some at this. He knew that Robert had friends at college that, like him, were really into sci-fi, and he often came home spouting some exciting new author or title. “OK,” he said, “when shall we meet?”

“I’ll call you,” Robert said.

“Great,” he said. Then, as they pulled into the parking lot Caleb said, “So, Jenny, what do you need?”

“I don’t really need…” she started to say, but Robert turned around and handed her two hundred dollars. “Oh, my. Come on Caleb,” she said, piling out of the car, “I have some shopping to do!”

Grace looked at Robert and grinned, but he said, “So do we,” and got out himself.

She took his hand, and in a worried voice, said, “Are you OK with this? Did I pressure you into this?”

Robert pulled her over to a wall, and said, “No, not at all. I should have done this a while ago. There is just something else I am worried about. Don’t worry, I am thrilled,” he finished, kissing her.

“Well,” she said, breathing again, “OK. If you say so,” she added with a grin. “So, rings…”

She took forever at the jewelers, and then eventually picked out a white gold ring with three colors of stones on it. It looked very nice on her, altho not at all what Robert would have picked. “Great,” he said, kissing her, “It looks wonderful. I’ll call Caleb now, and you can show Jenny. She will be ecstatic.”

“Yo, Caleb. We are at…” Robert looked across the way, “We are at Jon’s Toys. Yes, whatever, you know where it is? Oh, OK,” I looked down the hallway, “Well, come this way, the bookstore is on this side.”

Girls must have telescopic eyes or something, because Jenny spotted the ring about a mile away down the hallway, and came running up with a scream, “Grace!! Oh, Grace!!” She said, coming up and grabbing her hand and dancing up and down. Every single girl and most of the guys were looking at them, and Robert was glad when Caleb finally arrived.

“See you, girls,” he said, and walked away toward the bookstore. “Look, Caleb, I really need to talk to you.”

“You proposed to Grace?” He said.

“Yes, you twit, now shut up and listen. I really, really need to talk to you.”

“It seems a bit too late for that,” he said, “you already proposed.”

“Not about that, you moron,” Robert said, slapping him upside the head, “about something else.”

“Like why you are suddenly pushing Jenny on me?” He asked.

“No, not that either. Although I suppose they are related,” Robert said, thinking about it. “But stop complaining. She thinks you are her match made in heaven, and you think she’s hot, so what’s your beef?”

“A guy likes to do the choosing himself,” he whined.

“Not a guy like you,” Robert said. “If your dad told you that he had betrothed you to Jenny, and that she was moving in tonight, you would be so excited you would, you’ld wet yourself.” he finished, with one of their favorite crudities. Caleb had gotten it from some book years ago and the two of them used it whenever he could. Out of earshot of their mothers, of course.

“Well, I’d…”

“Listen!” Robert said, “This is important. Aliens have landed, the earth is under attack, a giant sea squid is about to eat your mother! Shut up and listen!!”

“Whoa, dude, sorry.” He said. “Chill. Ice Cream,” he said, “and I’m all ears.”

So they got their ice creams and went outside to sit on a bench.

“Listen, I had this really mind blowing dream last night…” Robert said, and related, in brief form, his imaginary last year.

“Wow,” he said, “so you had a baby as a girl. And you, like, did it? With me?!!”

“I had the baby, yes. But I didn’t ‘do it’. I mean we must have, but the dream skipped over those bits. And it wasn’t ‘me’! I was a girl, or the girl had my memories, or something. But it wasn’t me. I was just sort of there, trapped. I could do some stuff… like the whole topless bit. You really enjoyed that, dude.”

“I’ve seen you topless,” he said, “Bottomless, for that matter. And there is nothing at all interesting…”

“It wasn’t me. It was this chick that was me. I mean, I don’t know what I mean, but she was hot and you enjoyed it. But that isn’t the point.”

“Well, I’m glad that you didn’t drag me out here to make me eat ice cream and listen to some perverted wet dream. What is the point, then?”

“The point is, that it is coming true!’

Caleb stared at Robert, who blushed, “NO! You moron. Not that bit. The other bits. I met this Jeremy fellow today, the one who haunted me in my dream. And… well I really can’t tell you the other thing but… well, Grace told me something just today that she had told me in the dream. The exact same thing. And she hadn’t ever told anyone about it!”

“So, you think…?”

“I don’t know what I think! I am going nuts here.”

“Is that why you proposed?”

“No! I mean, the dream had a lot to do with it. I really enjoyed being married, even tho I was a girl and it was with you and all. Having the baby was sooo cool, even tho there was all this girlish bit I still kind of, well, I felt like a father, sitting in the background, watching. And Grace was in the dream, and I had had a chat with her, as a girl. Or as a boy in a girl, or whatever. And I learned some things about her. We even, sort of, committed to each other… if we ever got back, you know.”

“Well, it is all very confusing,” Caleb said. “But unless you are playing some joke on me…?”

“I swear, I absolutely swear.”

“Well, then, as your best friend I am obligate to believed you. Let us get back inside and back to the girls. I will think about this.”

They walked back in and then Caleb stopped. “Say, while we are being serious, and while you are still sworn to tell the truth, we’re you kidding me about Jenny? Does she really worship the ground I walk on?”

“You are a stupid, science fiction reading, moron. And she doesn’t exactly worship the ground you walk on. And she thinks you think of her as a sister, and her best friends sister, not as a girl. And she scares you to death with some of the ‘girly’ things she does, and she knows it but doesn’t know what it is exactly you are scared of. But she wants you.”

“So what should I do?”

“Well, I’ll help. But you…” Robert thought for a moment. He thought, ironically, back to the dream where he had gotten to know Jenny so much better. “I tell you what, two things. First, hold her hand. Don’t say anything, just hold her hand. She can’t mistake that. Then, start throwing your weight around. Tell her you don’t like that dress, or those shoes, or that makeup. Especially the makeup. Tell her that a swimsuit of hers shows too much skin for anyone else to see, but that she can wear it for you. Like that.”

“Just, hold her hand?” He said, rather stuck on that first point.

“It isn’t hard,” Robert said, reaching out, “do you need to practice?”

“No!” He said, jerking his away as Robert laughed, “But you think she won’t mind?”

“She’ll wet herself,” Robert assured him.